DUBLIN – Officially, the mission of An Garda Síochána, the national police force of Ireland, is “working with communities to protect and serve.”
More specifically, the core functions of the Gardai (as the force is commonly referred to) include “the detection and prevention of crime,” ensuring the national security of Ireland, “working with communities to prevent anti-social behavior” and “promoting an inter-agency approach to problem solving and improving the overall quality of life.”
I suppose it must have been the latter core function the (as-yet-unidentified) the Gardai officer currently in the U.K. tabloid headlines was performing when he joined in the production of a sexually explicit video uploaded to an unspecified porn site over the weekend.
In a detailed, almost clinical breakdown of the depicted action, The Sun described what sounds like light roadside bondage and public sex.
Per The Sun, the video in question shows “the man, who is wearing a jacket emblazoned with GARDA, placing the brunette woman in handcuffs. The woman then performs a sex act on him before climbing on the bonnet of the car which is also emblazoned with the Garda logo.”
If you reflexively assumed the “sex act” vaguely referred to above must have been the maneuver euphemistically referred to by some as the “horizontal mambo,” The Sun’s description goes on to specify otherwise.
“The enthusiastic duo then have full intercourse,” The Sun report noted.
I’m glad, for the sake of both the cop and the woman (referred to in the reports only as “Carla”), the couple engaged in full intercourse because, in my experience, partial intercourse often results in immense frustration that certainly doesn’t end when the partial intercourse itself does.
Be that as it may, it appears Carla has a thing for men in uniform, considering another of her recently uploaded videos features her “having sex with two men in Defence Forces clothing.”
To be fair, it’s less than certain the men depicted in either video are who and what they appear to be. It’s possible they’re simply dressed for the parts they play and are not, in fact, cops or soldiers.
On the other hand, if it turns out the man in the video uploaded Sunday is a Garda officer, he’d hardly be the first cop to find himself in hot water over participating in porn.
While it’s likely the most common form of porn-related trouble for cops is the same as for any other occupation — i.e., getting caught watching the stuff at work — internet porn history is not short on examples of real cops getting in real trouble for their smutty moonlighting, although in several instances, the officers involved weren’t yet cops at the time of their performance (or claimed they weren’t, at least).
To cite just a few examples of cops gone carnal, there was Sabine Raymonvil in Miami, who found herself fighting for her job when her porn performances became public knowledge (Raymonvil said all her porn performances took place before she became a cop, but this was a much-disputed claim). L.A. parking cop John Dancler’s employment was terminated and appeal of dismissal denied for his carnal shenanigans, and Mike Verdugo was dismissed over a single bondage video filmed roughly 12 years prior to the internal complaint that resulted in his firing.
It remains to be seen whether the man who appeared in Carla’s video is truly a cop, but if he is, you can bet this situation won’t end well for him. One “security source” who spoke to the Irish Mirror sure seemed to think the man was a cop, saying the guy is “believed to be based in the South West of the country.”
Either way, the video itself appears to have drawn mixed reviews from viewers.
On the bright side, the Mirror reported one viewer said it was a “great video,” while a second termed it a “whopper” (whatever that means in this context). The Sun’s readership was a bit less charitable, however, with the viewer who tipped the paper to the video calling it “the least erotic thing I have ever seen.”