LOS ANGELES – In order to make a splash in her new career, porn performer Tianna Hydra first has to mop up a spill created by her previous job.

Earlier this week gossip rags revealed that prior to distinguishing herself as a skilled fellatio multitasker in the Blowbang Bimbo Blondes series from Suck It Dry Productions, Hydra appeared on the popular Kudos Network show Real Hairstylists of Central Alameda, working under her real name, Tyra Bollocks.

“At first I was shocked to hear people talking about me doing reality TV, because that term is just so laden with negative perceptions about attention-starved morons, Hollywood head-cases and ambitious star-fuckers,” Hydra said. “But I never thought anybody would use the term ‘reality TV’ to describe my past, because the show I was on was a serialized documentary, not a reality show.”

Despite assertions by other featured hairstylists, several of whom have said the show was almost entirely staged, Hydra claimed everything about her appearance on the discontinued series was “totally legit.”

“A lot of people point to the episode in which I was rushed to the hospital in critical condition but was discharged two hours later without treatment of any kind and say it’s proof the whole show was fake,” Hydra said. “But the truth is my initial prognosis really was dire — until they realized the dark spot on my scan was just interference caused by my belly-ring and not a huge, life-threatening kidney stone.”

Frequent co-star Ryan Rockloins said he was surprised to hear about Hydra’s connection to the reality TV industry, as it never came up during the many shoots the two performers have done together.

“Normally, porn chicks are pretty talkative when it comes to anything mainstream they’ve done,” Rockloins said. “Take Dakota Horizon, for instance. She was an extra on one lousy episode of The Staggering Mortally Wounded back in 2012, and she hasn’t shut up about it since. I guess Tianna must really be ashamed of the hairdresser reality show or she would have at least rubbed it in my face a little back when I was all excited about getting a call-back from the producers of Marriage Concentration Camp. I didn’t make the show because I was deemed too likable.”

Kansas-based African-American attorney and cast member of Brothers in Arma Ronnie Cochran said a lot of professionals who double as reality show cast members worry about the impact their televised life can have on their on their professional endeavors.

“I’ve had some trouble convincing prospective clients it’s not a conflict of interest to represent them ethically and maintain confidentiality about their cases while being constantly followed around by a TV crew,” Cochran said. “But the show’s ratings are so low, I tell them it’s very unlikely any potential jurors will find out they’re completely and unquestionably guilty, which they invariably are every time. Plus, you don’t need to be a genius, or even a reality TV star, to know none of my clients’ protestations of innocence should ever be taken seriously, at all. Hell, if they were innocent, they wouldn’t retain me; they’d get a real lawyer — probably someone less concerned with getting famous who cameras don’t follow around all the time.”

Regardless of how her critics, the public at large and every other thinking human being may feel about reality television, Hydra insists she’s not ashamed of her appearance on Real Hairstylists because the show “simply portrays the daily life of a stylist as it actually is.”

“A lot of people don’t believe this, but as a stylist you put your life on the line, literally, every day,” Hydra said. “Or maybe that’s what it’s like being a police officer, I’m not sure. I auditioned to appear on Authentic Cops of Ferndale a few years back, too, so sometimes I get the two confused.”