In the Trenches: Hooray for Bisexual Girls!
Lots of females seem to do it together, be it in Houston, San Diego, New York, or elsewhere. No, I’m not referring to texting or going to restaurant/public/club/mall/etc. restrooms with each other so they can have someone to chat with while they’re urinating or checking their makeup. Instead, I’m talking about the girls who sexually experiment with other girls, some just one-time, and some repeatedly. Some continue the fun of female sex play for years, while others check it out for only a bit and then go back to having sex exclusively with guys. I imagine that because of circumstances or marriage, a lot of them missed out on the opportunity to experiment with girl-on-girl sex, but some of them might still wonder a little about it.The reason why I’m focusing on this is because some folks, mostly single guys with girlfriends, and some engaged/married couples whom I hang out with, recently asked me what I thought was a good way for them to further enhance and perhaps rejuvenate their sex lives.
Here’s what I told them: communication, both verbal and non-verbal, and especially “listening,” is key to keeping the sex exciting and loving. Keeping and nurturing the attentive pre-marriage courting seems important and might demonstrate the love that leads to more sex-love. Couples should make each other their number one personal priority and not let the pace of the day lead them away from the specialness of their relationship and the joy of expressive love for each other. Light touches as you pass your mate while going from one room to another, loving kisses and snuggling mean a lot (especially if they connote love and caring, not just horniness and sexual need), and genuine listening shows ones respect and love, too!
I think it’s important to discuss in a fun way what each other especially likes during lovemaking/sex. Does she like slaps on her butt, kissing of her nipples, or mouthing of them, or sucking? Is her preference for soft, medium, or hard, fast, medium, slow? What are her preferences for cunnilingus? Perhaps she likes a variety, instead of the same way, or speed, or positioning, or…? Don’t overlook the caring that can be shown by the whisperings of your love, or by touching, caressing, massaging, holding, etc. In my opinion, all these forms of communication enhance intimate relationships.
I think there are some women who would love to find out if the blowjob she gives could be done in an even more enjoyable way to and for her lover. I know, I know, some men don’t want to chance losing out on even bad head; but, if you tactfully and lovingly show her where your favorite spot is and help her find the optimum way to enhance your sexual pleasure, she might appreciate it and will feel good about herself and the love she feels and shows by giving you oral pleasures.
It’s a two-way street, so be sure to ask how you might heighten her sexual enjoyment during lovemaking. Lovingness can lead to sex-making, and sex can lead to lovemaking, but couples need to communicate with each other in an open and continuing way.
OK, back to the first paragraph, which alluded to one of the ways some women socialize together. I’ve frequently opined that the best way to find out what your woman wants you to sexually do to her, with her, and for her, is to watch and listen carefully to her having sex with another female — I think what she does to/with/for that woman will convey closely what she enjoys and sexually wants from YOU. Just do with her what she displayed visually and orally -– it just possibly might be a recipe for enhanced sexual lovemaking. Now, to make the preceding happen, you somehow need to openly communicate how exciting it would be for you to see her with another woman, and then pray that you’ll get that opportunity for your next birthday present or something! Imagine how exciting your sex lives could be enriched if you could somehow make it happen!
One other thing, perhaps using the Internet for the two of you to shop for a dildo or strap-on in anticipation of her bringing another woman home someday, might motivate her to “find” a women sooner rather than later. Watching her use those adult toys might show you what sex positions she wants you to use with her! Prior to her “girl-girl” date, perhaps the two of you watching some girl-on-girl porn action via VOD or a DVD might give your young lady some ideas, and encouragement to find a way to make it happen. If she’s too shy to have you in the room during her “girl-girl” adventure, perhaps a camcorder on a tripod might be OK with the girls — imagine the turn-on of planning a “date” to watch the footage together!?
So, the above suggestions were my thoughts. Hopefully, some of the people at that gathering will make it happen. I guess I’ll know if I see them beaming from ear to ear sometime down the road!
For the single guys using the “bar scene” to find sex, I feel it essential to realize that there’s a fine line between drinking so as to get one’s nerve up to approach some babe in the bar or club, and the subsequent ability to be fully functional if you do indeed get lucky and end up in bed with that babe later in the evening. So, don’t over-drink! And, as a public service announcement, don’t drive when you are under the influence.
One last thing — as an old fogey with three skin cancers on my face and 28 stitches from removal surgeries, religiously use sun block! I’m tempted here to also preach and nag against smoking, but I won’t!
Summer is almost here. I wish good weather, health, happiness, and lots of great sex for you.