By King Mihirakula Special to YNOT LOS ANGELES – Back in my day, if you wanted to be king, you had to murder someone — unless your daddy was already the king and he was willing to die immediately by some means other than you stabbing him in the neck. Staying the king was no...

By Dewey Trueman Special to YNOT WASHINGTON – While I think we can all agree it’s not ideal to have federal government employees surfing porn on the job instead of dutifully depriving Americans of their civil rights or burning through taxpayers’ money with hair-brained...

TAMPA, Fla. – These days, you can’t be too careful when it comes to the technology you allow inside your home. With the rapid advancement in sophistication of artificial intelligence and robotics, soon you won’t be able to leave your wallet in the same room with your Roomba, or...

By Abigail Cuthbert Special to YNOT OAKLAND, Calif. – When you’ve already made the mistake of locating your professional sports franchise adjacent to the modern equivalent of Sodom and Gomorrah, one must be very careful not to exhibit other errors in judgment that could anger a...

VICTORIA, Canada – You might not have heard about this, because it has been written about by right-leaning media outlets only approximately 3.8 billion times since 2012, but a few years back a famous and very popular porn star stopped doing porn because she found God. If you...

MIDLAND, Mich. – For some reason, almost every article that references Joseph P. Overton, the fellow who came up with an appropriately-named political science theory called the Overton Window, starts by acknowledging the reader has likely never heard of him. I’m not going to do...

By Matt LeMaestro Special to YNOT CHICAGO – When it comes to college football prospects and the NFL draft, I thought I knew everything. I thought I had considered every angle and anticipated all the possibilities, from each prospect’s ceiling as a talent to the myriad ways they...

NEW YORK – A groundbreaking new study conducted by researchers at South Bronx University’s Postal School of Public Health has documented a notable increase in the number of scientists who think surveys are a lousy means of determining causality. According to the study’s abstract,...

By Prudence Beecher Special to YNOT SALT LAKE CITY, Utah – When a man like Utah State Senator Todd Weiler bravely takes a stand against a global scourge like pornography, inspiring his colleagues to join him in declaring smut to be the public health crisis pandemic we all know it...

By Dewey Trueman Special to YNOT PROVIDENCE, R.I. – Breaking news: Bernie Sanders is in stable but elderly condition following a savage beating from political rival Hillary Clinton, who allegedly thrashed her opponent about the face using a book made entirely of pornography....