The problem with self-regulation as it applies to the .xxx debate is that we have no way of knowing what the final “best practices” will be. In the abstract, the “responsible self-regulation” IFFOR will promote sounds harmless enough, but what if one of the “best practices” amounts to an arbitrary prohibition of a given category of content?…This is precisely where being a “supporter” of .xxx in its current state gets tricky, in my opinion. Suppose you’re a paysite owner who operates sites that run the gamut, from solo nudes to extreme S&M, and when the final rules for .xxx sites are revealed, you find that half your sites aren’t even eligible? This hypothetical naturally raises further, related questions: Will the best practices be established before names become available for sale? If I purchase a domain that I intend to use, only to find that the content type is expressly prohibited by the .xxx rules, do I get my money back.

I wrote the above paragraphs in August 2005, in a column entitled “Evaluating the Unknown: The .xxx Dilemma.”

It is now close to a year and half later and I still haven’t the foggiest idea what I would be supporting, were I to express support for .xxx. This vagueness is not the sole reason I’m against establishing the .XXX domain, but it remains the primary reason.

We have nothing close to a complete picture to work from in assessing the potential impact of .xxx would be, and I have a very hard time “supporting” anything so entirely undefined.

What will the “best practices” adopted by IFFOR consist of? We don’t know.

As it has been asserted by the ICM that it will fight to keep .xxx a purely voluntary measure, what shape will the eventual rules for operating a site on the .xxx domain take regarding links to adult sites hosted on other domains, or accepting traffic from sites on hosted on other domains? Again, we don’t know.

To support something so ill-defined, in my mind, is akin to supporting the political campaign of a candidate who professes no party affiliation, hasn’t answered any questions regarding the policy positions they favor, and to do so simply because that candidate has assured me “I am for good things, especially those good things you will like.”

We’re now told by some, and not just by ICM representatives, that .xxx is going to happen, period, regardless of how much opposition there is to the idea from within the industry. I have no idea whether this assertion is true; I heard similar bravado over the summer of 2005 regarding the then-upcoming vote on a previous version of the ICM contract by ICANN (“It will pass,” “It has already been decided,” etc.), and that confident assertion proved false.

While I don’t support .xxx, I don’t consider those that disagree with me “the enemy,” and I don’t quite understand the argument put forward by those that so strongly disapprove of the forum scheduled at the Xbiz Hollywood gathering later this month.

In a couple of industry message board threads, some have expressed concern that the .xxx panel discussion will be interpreted as de facto support for the sTLD, based in part, it seems, on Xbiz publisher Tom Hymes’ statement that he invited “all adult entertainment industry professionals to attend the panel on the assumption that .xxx will pass. The question that the panel and the attendees must address is, ‘What happens now?’”

I’m hopeful that the panel proves more than an exchange of heated rhetoric, whatever assumptions we all walk into the room with.

Much has been made of Tom’s statement quoted above (far too much, in my opinion) and the debate over the merits, or lack thereof, of .xxx is now being obscured by the question of who may be clandestinely supporting .xxx while publicly stating opposition to it, or just staying out of the conversation altogether.

Regardless of whether .xxx passes in its current form, passes in some future form, or never passes at all, there will still be an adult internet industry when the dust settles, and we will still have the need and perhaps even the desire to do business with people who disagreed with us on .xxx, supporters and detractors alike.

In the interest of making our future dealings a whole lot less awkward, I’d like to see an effort to get the current .xxx debate on more civil and productive footing, particularly where the upcoming panel is concerned. The last thing we need is to stand there loudly calling each other out as traitorous hypocrites, senseless obstructionists, or worse, in a forum that is bound to be recorded and reported on fairly extensively, as adult events go.

I’m not suggesting that you don’t have the right to turn to your opposition and say “Fuck you, fuck your argument, and fuck the horse that carried you both in here.”

I’m just saying that when your expression is being recorded, whatever you write or say in this “Digital Age,” once you have said or written it, it is out there, for the world to see, and it will be treated as your best, most carefully considered thoughts on the issue at hand, even if your words are anything but carefully considered.

In other words, if you are against .xxx, and you are worried about how the adult industry’s response to .xxx is perceived by ICANN, and whether they think there is significant opposition to the idea, you also need to recognize that the manner in which we express our opposition counts, too.

So, if you can make it, I say go to the panel discussion, and say your piece. Say it as you see fit, naturally – just be aware that your words will have a lifespan that may well outlast the emotions that inspired your choice of those words.