By Prudence Beecher
Special to YNOT
KAMPALA, Uganda – Nothing gets me angrier than hearing people say combatting the spread of pornography shouldn’t be the highest priority for the American government.
Sure, what could possibly be at stake when it comes to ignoring the scourge of porn? You know, other than our eternal souls, the lives of our children, the very future of mankind and other trivial details.
We finally get a presidential candidate who is serious about fighting online porn and what happens? He’s mocked instead of applauded as he properly should be.
It’s almost as though Mr. Trump had just suggested something really stupid and off-base, like the idea Vladimir Putin hasn’t already threatened the territorial integrity of the Ukraine, or that South Korea doesn’t pay anything to the U.S. for the troops stationed there to help protect the country from their adversarial neighbors to the north. Those are two clearly wrong things Mr. Trump is way, way too smart to say, obviously.
While the mainstream media and its liberal allies in Hollywood seem bound and determined to prevent this country from benefiting from the steadfast moral leadership of a decent man like Mr. Trump, it’s comforting to know there are other countries that do have their priorities straight. Countries like the great nation of Uganda, for example.
Here in the U.S., I believe we spend way too much money trying to prevent people from dying when their impending demise is really just God’s Will working among us. Meanwhile, we ignore the single biggest public health threat in the history of mankind — pornography — while falling all over ourselves to combat naturally occurring diseases like heart disease, AIDS, bromhidrosis and cancer, all of which are far less problematic than porn, .
Not so in Uganda, where they have only two functioning brachytherapy machines and recently spent $88,000 on a porn-detecting machine to help enforce the country’s strong and unarguably necessary anti-pornography law.
According to media reports, the machine was built in South Korea, and while it’s not clear how it works, it sounds like just the sort of thing we need here in the U.S. Our government, however, will never invest in such a machine so long as there’s one porn-addicted Democrat left in Congress to filibuster a motion to add funds for such a machine to our national security budget.
Regardless whether we ever get one, this amazing machine sounds like quite the Godsend for any nation trying to combat porn. According to the Ugandan Minister of Ethics, Simon Lokodo, the South Korean porn-detector can “detect, control and scrutinize porn on mobile handsets and other electronic devices.”
I’ll admit, the part of me that distrusts all government is a bit concerned about the idea of some Washington bureaucrat “controlling” the porn on our local youth pastor’s smartphone. But so long as the Dept. of Decency (a new agency I assume Mr. Trump will create during the illustrious first 100 days of his inevitable two-term presidency) is staffed by devout, God-fearing Christians, I easily can set aside my concern and trust they will do the right thing with their newfound moral authority.
The bigger question is can we attack porn the way we need to without giving short shrift to other national priorities? Will we need to postpone overturning Obamacare, passing an amendment to the Constitution defining marriage as the union of one Christian man and one Christian woman, and locking Hillary Clinton inside a rocket we then launch into deep space?
As much as it pains me to have to choose, if we must delay Hillary’s trip to the GN-z11 galaxy in order to buy a few hundred thousand South Korean porn detectors for deployment across the country, or put up with Obamacare for a few more years, I think it will be well worth the exchange for being able to browse social media knowing I’ll never be exposed to a basketball player’s penis thereon.
If any single country on the planet can lead the free world, promote democracy across the globe, eradicate pornography and send Hillary on a one-way trip to Ursa Major, America is that nation.
Uganda, after all, doesn’t have a national space program.
Prudence Beecher is a devout Christian, mother of seven, needlework expert and anti-pornography activist from Anniston, Alabama. She is also the author of numerous fine e-books, including Watching Porn is the Same Thing as Murder and Evolution: One Big, Secular Lie.
