SAN DIEGO, CA — “Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. I have no idea what our cruising speed or distance from the earth is. But I do know that Puma Swede’s ass is much more fun to look at than the flight controls.” That’s not what a disgruntled but horny pilot said while flying over the San Diego waterfront, but he could have – and he would have been telling the truth.Earlier this month, San Diego pilot David Martz learned that his entry into the Mile High Club, courtesy of Swedish porn bombshell Swede was not only a memory to be cherished – but the last one featuring him as a pilot that he will have for a very long time.
In spite of Martz’ appeal, a National Transportation Safety Board administrative law judge in Gardena determined that the star fucking helicopter pilot’s wings will remain clipped.
At issue was Martz’ buzz by of the San Diego waterfront in 2005. In addition to dipping close enough to see the earthbound fun, Martz and Swede enjoyed a bit of in-air sex. Foolish enough under even the best of circumstances, this particular foolishness managed to be immortalized by a tourist with a video camera.
Alas for the 52-year-old Martz, who hoped he might be able to convince the judge to restore his revoked pilot’s license, not only does he have a number of Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) violations, but the previously unknown video proof of his tryst just wound up on the internet.
The video, which is said to show Swede removing her clothing and then getting jiggy with the man in the driver’s seat, supports the FAA’s contention that the pilot could not possibly have seen or reached the flight controls, thanks to Swede’s distracting presence.
Martz, who is free to appeal the ruling, insists that since it’s been four whole years since he got laid while flying a helicopter over the downtown waterfront, all should be forgiven. Further, he has assured the NTSB that he has changed his ways and served his time on another, unrelated suspension.
Unless a further appeal is more successful, Martz must wait until 2010 to reapply for his license.
