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By

//Ben Suroeste

Is This the Best Porn Headline Ever, or What?

FIRE ISLAND, N.Y. – Outside the range of her long-running cable access TV show, most people had likely never heard of Robin Byrd until recently, despite her performance in one of the best known adult movies (with one of the most often-referenced titles) ever made: Debbie Does...
Posted On 23 Oct 2015
, By Ben Suroeste

SFPD On The Lookout For Killer Porn

SAN FRANCISCO – In response to a high-profile grassroots billboard campaign, the San Francisco Police Dept. is now reportedly on the lookout for “murderous pornography, lethal smut and extremely hazardous erotica.” SFPD spokesperson Nancy Spinelli said while the department...
Posted On 22 Oct 2015
, By Ben Suroeste

Because It’s Going To Happen Anyway

LOUISVILLE, Ky. – Like sunrise, death, taxes and the perennial mediocrity of the post-Shula-era Miami Dolphins, it’s inevitable someone in the adult industry is going to make a porno movie spoofing the sex scandal currently rocking the University of Louisville men’s basketball...
Posted On 21 Oct 2015
, By Ben Suroeste

Finally, Jenna Jameson Weighs In

AMES, Iowa – Lagging behind some of her still-active porn star peers by a couple months, former top-shelf adult performer Jenna Jameson finally weighed in on the 2016 race for the White House. In tweeting her support for Marco Rubio, Jameson referred to the junior Republican...
Posted On 20 Oct 2015
, By Ben Suroeste

New ‘Facial Recognition’ Software Made Just For Porn

QUANTICO, Va. – Even before Birdseye View Entertainment retained porn director Jimmy Duskish as the studio’s resident POV auteur, Duskish was shooting upwards of 20 POV scenes per week, employing a wide variety of both female and male talent. At the time, Duskish didn’t know his...
Posted On 19 Oct 2015
, By Ben Suroeste

Why Do Science Teachers Care About Hotel Porn?

OAKLAND, Calif. – As regular readers of my posts know, I’m the sort of guy who will hop on a plane at the drop of a hat in my never-ending search for truth — or because when I’m really, really high, things like dropping hats appear to be explosive devices from which I feel...
Posted On 16 Oct 2015
, By Ben Suroeste

How Come Nobody Has Offered My Girls A Porn Job?

By Ronald Crump Special to YNOT NEW YORK – Dear losers, morons and haters who represent the porn industry, what the fuck is wrong with you people? Don’t you have any class? Any brains? Don’t you like making money? OK, if you do like making money, explain this to me: How come none...
Posted On 15 Oct 2015
, By Ben Suroeste

This is Why Performer Privacy Matters

COLUMBUS, Ga. – It’s easy to read articles about online stalker and would-be killer Brian Blankenship and dismiss his behavior as the ramblings of a walleyed lunatic or just another loudmouth internet troll who found out the hard he wasn’t as anonymous and untraceable when...
Posted On 14 Oct 2015
, By Ben Suroeste

Playboy Goes Non-Nude, Starts Porn Trend

CHICAGO – With the media world still puzzling over Playboy’s decision to drop full nudity, some trend-watching pornographers already have followed the lead of the legendary publication, considerably toning down their productions in pursuit of a new, “cleaner” brand...
Posted On 13 Oct 2015
, By Ben Suroeste

The Doctor Is In (Custody)

LAS VEGAS – When searching for a new primary care physician, I know it’s important to take a good look at my perspective doc’s licenses, because this is usually the quickest indicator of the physician’s background, education, experience and areas of expertise. So, when I saw Dr....
Posted On 12 Oct 2015
, By Ben Suroeste
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