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//Ben Suroeste
Parasited Releases Latest Installment of ‘House of Madness’

Parasited Releases Latest Installment of ‘House of Madness’

BUDAPEST, Hungary – In August, Hentaied released the first two installments of their “House of Madness” series. Now, the third installment has been released and Hentaied reports the site’s members “can’t get enough of the further adventures of Kelly Collins, Valentina Nappi, and...
Posted On 28 Oct 2024
, By Ben Suroeste
An Investigation Gets Tangled in Hentaied’s ‘Unknown Disappeared’

An Investigation Gets Tangled in Hentaied’s ‘Unknown Disappeared’

BUDAPEST, Hungary – When you’re a detective working in the Hentaied Universe, there are two things of which you can be sure: You’ll never work a mundane case and you’re likely to wind up with rapacious alien tentacles inserted deeply into one or more of your orifices. Those are...
Posted On 21 Oct 2024
, By Ben Suroeste
Of Judicial Misconduct, Proportionality and… Lip-Syncing on TikTok?

Judicial Misconduct, Proportionality and… Lip-Syncing on TikTok?

HACKENSACK, N.J. – “Judge Les Hayes once sentenced a single mother to 496 days behind bars for failing to pay traffic tickets. The sentence was so stiff it exceeded the jail time Alabama allows for negligent homicide.” So begins a 2020 Reuters article about American judges who...
Posted On 14 Oct 2024
, By Ben Suroeste
Donald Trump

The Good News Is, Trump’s Full of Shit

To put it mildly, I’m not a fan of former reality TV show host Donald J. Trump. To put it more precisely, I think Trump is a living piece of run over echidna dung who isn’t remotely qualified to be president of a high school student council, let alone President of the United...
Posted On 04 Oct 2024
, By Ben Suroeste
Parasited Returns to the Lab for New Research – and an Assassin

Parasited Returns to the Lab for New Research – and an Assassin

BUDAPEST, Hungary – The latest scene from Parasited revolves around a newly discovered variety of alien parasite (spoiler alert: this new kind makes people instantly sexually insatiable, much like its already-identified alien parasite cousins) and an assassin trying to stop it....
Posted On 04 Oct 2024
, By Ben Suroeste
Brenna McKenna Does Chemistry in Her Reality Kings Debut

Brenna McKenna Does Chemistry in Her Reality Kings Debut

LOS ANGELES, Calif. – Brenna McKenna, the tight and toned, all-natural alt Jersey girl, is “returning to college and taking a chemistry class” in her Reality Kings debut, setting off a chain reaction of sorts in a hot three-way scene. In “Risky Reactions,” Brenna dons a lab coat...
Posted On 25 Sep 2024
, By Ben Suroeste
Emiri Momota Plays a Parasite-Possessed Scientist in ‘Neuroscience’

Emiri Momota Plays a Parasite-Possessed Scientist in ‘Neuroscience’

BUDAPEST, Hungary – In the latest scene from Parasited, Hentaied Universe contract star Emiri Momota plays a scientist whose late-night work in the lab poses hazards of a sort it’s safe to say nobody at Merck Pharmaceuticals has ever confronted. In “Neuroscience,” Emiri is...
Posted On 24 Sep 2024
, By Ben Suroeste
Chloe Amour Releases Four New Scenes on Her OnlyFans

Chloe Amour Releases Four New Scenes on Her OnlyFans

HOLLYWOOD, Calif. – Adult performer and content creator Chloe Amour has announced the release of four new scenes that promise “to keep fans mesmerized,” according to Chloe’s reps at Rising Star PR. Her latest release is “Chloe Amour Tesla car solo,” a solo masturbation scene in...
Posted On 02 Sep 2024
, By Ben Suroeste
The Problem is, Being ‘Weird’ is a GOOD Thing

The Problem is, Being ‘Weird’ is a GOOD Thing

Say it loud: I’m weird and I’m proud! If you’ve been following American politics lately… well, first, my apologies, because American politics have descended to depths even Mark Twain couldn’t have imagined. Bearing in mind that Twain once wrote “It could probably be shown by...
Posted On 07 Aug 2024
, By Ben Suroeste
Florida AG Sues Five Adult Companies Under State’s Age Verification Law

Do I Have What It Takes to be an Elected ‘Florida Man’?

TALAHASEE, Fla. – I’ve been contemplating a move to a new state for a long time, and in doing my due diligence, I decided it was probably wise to also consider whether I’d change my vocation while I was at it. Naturally, as a guy who has long made his living writing mostly untrue...
Posted On 12 Jul 2024
, By Ben Suroeste
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Novelty News

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