LONGMONT, CO — Perhaps he forgot. Perhaps he had something else on his mind. Perhaps he had somewhere else to be. Whatever the reason, self-proclaimed “age verification porn inspector,” Drew Libby, didn’t make it to his big court appearance. Yesterday was the date set aside for 33-year-old Libby’s preliminary hearing, after being arrested for visiting a local novelty store and trying to get free video product in exchange for a creative story.

While many a creative story has been told to many a shop clerk, this Libby is probably one of the first to try to pass himself off as a member of the law enforcement world. In this case, his claim to fame was flashing a phony badge and handing over a phony business card claiming to be part of a fictional Longmont, CO “age verification unit” and needed to verify the ages of various performers… by watching videos featuring them having sex, naturally.

Alas for the imaginative Libby, he was turned away empty handed – multiple times.

According to KRDO News Channel 13, public defender Kristi Sanders thinks her client might have been busy when he was supposed to be in court; busy being evaluated by the Colorado Mental Health Institute in Pueblo. The last she’d heard about him, he was being looked at by a local mental health facility that could have provided Libby with a referral.

Prosecutors don’t know where Libby is, either.

Theoretically, the case will be dealt with on Thursday, with all involved parties in attendance.