ICELAND — Women often joke about the value that men place upon their private parts, so few will likely be shocked to learn that there is now a museum dedicated to showcasing the might and magic that is the penis; both human and otherwise. The location of the museum, however, may surprise some, given that Iceland isn’t a nation most associate with such eccentric archives.Museum founder, owner, and curator Signurdur Hjartarson, however, knows that there’s no place like home to celebrate the many genital forms possessed by the animal kingdom’s male members – so to speak.
Beginning modestly in 1974 with the procurement of a bull’s penis, which Hjartarson describes as resembling a riding crop, his collection has engorged to 261 preserved bits once belonging to 90 different species.
Although the Icelandic Phallological Museum includes a 154 lb. sperm whale penis and a hamster bone penis so small it requires a magnifying glass to be admired, Hjartarson’s archive does not yet include an example from homo sapiens sapiens.
According to Reuters, that emptiness will eventually be filled, thanks to the generosity of a German, an American, a Briton, and a fellow Icelander; all willing to donate their love muscle upon their deaths.
Open to the international public from May through September, the museum now resides in the quiet fishing village of Husavik, nearly 300 miles northeast of the country’s capital. The plain brown building that encases the phalluses is only made remarkable by the presence of a tall brown penis near the door and a similarly shaped sign over the front porch.
According to Hjartarson, “We had 6,000 visitors last summer and actually made a profit.” Perhaps even more interesting, is the fact that 60-percent of those visitors were women.
Apparently men aren’t the only ones who find their wedding tackle fascinating.
Unlike the as-yet-procured human penises, those currently on display have largely been provided by fishermen, hunters, and biologists. Once inside the museum, they are preserved in jars of formaldehyde or dried for mounting on the walls.
Hjartarson confessed to Reuters that it hadn’t been his plan to be a penis museum curator when he began his hobby 24 years ago. At the time, he’d been a school administrator whose collection had resided within his office.
“They were not on display in the sitting room,” he assures.
Even now, Hjartarson’s collection is purely a matter of science and nature, as he has no sex toys, and no related paraphernalia, although he does have a few sculptures and novelty items.
Some items are stored more discreetly than others, however.
“Two elderly German women came in a while ago and after viewing the exhibit, they scolded me for displaying a group of figures in Kama Sutra poses,” Hjartarson explains. In order to preserve the sensibilities of other visitors, he placed the figures in a glass-topped box labeled “Erotica” and covered with a black cloth. “This way nobody has to view them unless they want to.”
While it seems an odd thing to be offended by in a penis-centric museum, Hjartarson’s intention is not to offend, but to enlighten – and even brighten – his visitors.
“I hope visitors leave the museum in a better mood than when they arrived,” he explains.
