GoAskAlex, an influential adult model, performer and advocate for people with disabilities, has released an inspiring guest post on Erika Lust’s website Lustzine.
The article, ‘Sexual Education & Disability: Sex with a Stoma’, emphasizes the flame-haired star’s emotional journey over the past few years personally and as an entertainer in a highly competitive industry that holds such high regard for physical beauty and fixed, long-held ideals of what theoretically turns us on.
“Nothing could have prepared me for the moment when I realized my life was about to drastically and permanently change,” she writes of her fateful 2019 doctor’s appointment that brought her to the realization that she needed colectomy surgery. “I was overwhelmed with emotion as he told me in no uncertain terms that I would need to have all five feet of my colon permanently removed. At that moment I knew that my life would never be the same.”
She referred to a medical pamphlet, ‘Sex and Intimacy’ that, while optimistic about resuming sexual activity when ready, the guide “offered no real insights into what that sexual wellness might actually look like.
“Aside from the lack of useful medical information, there was no guidance on how a person might feel confident and sexual again in their new body… it seemed as though no one in the hospital wanted the responsibility of shouldering an awkward conversation, and sadly the patient is the only one who suffers as a result.”
GoAskAlex explained further that “as a sex worker and former sex-shop employee, I have had an extensive education on the intricacies of my own sexuality. As someone who gleefully boasts that they ‘get naked for money’, I was prepared to take on the challenge of getting to know my new body. Not only this, but I had the encouragement of tens of thousands of friends and fans across multiple social media platforms, all of whom were cheering me on.”
Ultimately, she advises that “those who are struggling with their sexual wellness (due to a disability, or any other reason!), remember that you have the right to enjoy healthy sexual relationships regardless of your physical limitations.
“You have the same sexual rights as everyone else, able-bodied or not. I believe in an accessible future, and the time has come to demand comprehensive, accessible sex education. People with disabilities date, masturbate, have sex, and even watch porn just like the rest of the world does. Those same people deserve sexual wellness and autonomy just like the rest of the world does.”
To read the GoAskAlex’s Lustzine article in its entirety, visit Erika Lust and follow her on Twitter and Instagram.
