CHISASIBI, Canada – Collectors of First Nations art who enjoy sex toys have an opportunity to combine their passions … but only if they’ve got deep pockets.

A purported Canadian First Nations artist who calls himself Max is offering what he calls a one-of-a-kind, hand-carved representation of the Cree spirit Kyynmwahpptby, “the ever watchful good spirit to help you see all positive things in life.” The piece — reportedly nine years in the making and measuring 19 inches long by four inches wide at the base — is sculpted of wood and hand-painted in traditional Native American colors.

It resembles a tattooed, erect penis. In fact, the title on Max’s eBay listing is “Wood Sculpture Native Spirit Kyynmwahppt, Art, Dildo, sexy, penis.”

The asking price? U.S. $2.5 million, plus an additional U.S. $962 for shipping.

“I know my price is at a level, but I want to help needy people in my area, town, city, country and our planet, but unfortunately I need money to help me realize my biggest dream,” Max wrote in the item’s description. “My biggest DREAM to raise enough money to go in poor villages and set up a well, clean water, With clean water it’s easy to show them how to garden and then to be healthier. To help the most people I can in needy countries.” [Entire quote verbatim.]

Max offers several other spirit sculptures, including the female spirit Chtiwootookit, the Spirit of Greatness (which for some reason has no native name) and the spirit Kiwanootook. The latter two evidently are male spirits, because Max describes each not only as a penis, but also as a cock. The starting bids on these three items range from U.S. $9.99 to U.S. $125.