CUBA — Now we know. After all those sanctimonious lectures about how smoking and fucking cut lives short and how the wise man or woman eschews them along with meat, sweets, and pretty much anything else that gives life pleasure, Cuba proves them wrong.The Communist-led island of 11.2 million has an unusually high number of centenarians. According to a recent study, more than half of them give coffee, cigars, and sex the thumbs up for having helped them reach 100.

The 54 centenarians in the Villa Clara province who spoke with Dr. Nancy Nepomuceno’s study representatives say that although they’ve gone light on the booze during their multitude of years, they’ve enjoyed many a cup of coffee, a good smoke, and a great lay.

As Nepomuceno reported at the National Geriatrics and Social Work workshop in Santa Clara, more than 3,000 Cubans have reached 100, with 60-percent of their parents having also seen the century mark. Those involved in the research led disciplined but hardly ascetic lives, claiming a passionate indulgence for cigars and coffee, as well as an interest in other pleasures, including but not limited to a vigorous interest in the luxuries of the flesh.

Fish, white meat, eggs, milk, vegetables, and small amounts of salt and seasonings played a large part of nearly every interview subject’s life, with most remaining mentally alert, enjoying a good life, and engaging in physical labor.
The average life span of a Cuban is 76, but those living in the Villa Clara province can generally expect an additional two years, still well below those enjoyed by the study’s focus group.