YNOT – Here’s a shocker: Most porn star marriages, like most marriages in Hollywood, don’t last. Ask Tera Patrick, whose new memoir, Sinner Takes All, lays the blame for the breakup of her seven-year marriage to rocker-cum-adult industry performer Evan Seinfeld on him choosing porn over her.
According to the book, last summer Patrick told Seinfeld to give up either performing in porn or their marriage. After all, Patrick exited the performing end of the business in 2006, so why shouldn’t her hubby? He declined to quit having sex on film, and the couple split in September.
"I said to Evan, 'I’m your wife, and that is the strongest bond two people should have, and that should come first,'" Patrick wrote in the memoir. "'I’ve moved on from porn. And I want you to stop. You promised me you’d only do porn for a few years. Your few years are up.'"
"His take was this: 'I’m having a great time. I’m having my cake and I get to eat it, too.'"
Patrick said she wanted the marriage to last, but after appearing in more than 100 XXX-rated videos during a 10-year career that saw her rise to the top tier of adult stars and win multiple awards, she was ready to prove her worth in other endeavors. Seinfeld — whose mainstream credits include a role in the HBO drama Oz and a stint as the bass player for the heavy metal band Biohazard — should have been ready to retire from porn as well, since he didn’t even enter the industry until after they met.
“My big point was this: Almost every couple in porn breaks up, and I didn’t want to be another porn statistic,” she wrote in the book. “I didn’t want the porn curse to hit us. I’ve seen it happen to other couples. Doing porn as a husband and wife team is safe, but once one branches out to do people outside the marriage, that’s when the trouble seems to set in.”
After the breakup, Patrick moved out of the couple’s Los Angeles home and moved in with her mother in Las Vegas. She continues to work in the adult industry, but no longer has sex on film. Among other things, currently she hosts School of Sex on cable TV’s Playboy Channel.
The end of her marriage was painful, she wrote in the memoir.
“Though it was my choice, that doesn’t mean I wasn’t devastated,” she noted. “I so wanted [Seinfeld] to tell me he would quit and put me first. But he didn’t, and that will forever hurt.”
Patrick will autograph copies of Sinner Takes All during AVN’s Adult Entertainment Expo in January in Las Vegas.
Sue Denim is a freelance writer specializing in sexuality and the adult entertainment industry.
